Two down, two to go. Whoa, we’re half way there. Whoa, living on a prayer. Take my hand, Bear Nation, we’ll make it I swear.
With both the Bears’ and Saints’ seasons on the line, the Bears failed to make as many bonehead plays as New Orleans – a seeming rarity this season – and squeaked one out at home. And this time, the 27-24 final in OT against an NFC South opponent went in our favor. This was our first win in four NFC South match-ups, which isn’t a good sign. But it marks our third two-game win streak, as we advance to 8-6 (.571), our third highest winning percentage on the year (1-0, 1.00; 5-3, .625). And for the third year in a row, we ended the Saints’ season. So technically, and I’m not saying this to brag here, but technically, we own them bitches.
Sure, we found yet another way to demonstrate futility by fumbling on our own goal line, handing back a 7-point advantage we got 12 seconds into the game. Sure, we led for 54 minutes (including being up 21-7 at half time), and didn’t score in the second half until we lost the lead and time expired. Sure, we may have to start using a Rex-ism for Orton’s play, calling him either Good Kyle or Bad Kyle. Sure, our two longest offensive plays came on pass interference penalties (for 38 and 39 yds), both of which put us inside the 15, and both of which led to scores. Sure, if you take away those 2 penalties, we were only 3 for 12 on 3rd down. Sure, Forte ran for a season-low 34 yards on 11 carries. Sure, we had exactly as many TOTAL yards as NO had PASSING yards (226). Sure, it took OT to finish them off. And sure, we got sacked with two seconds left, when time would have run out and we would have lost if they hadn’t tackled the Beard so quickly. But we did win. And hey, if the Bears can find a way to utilize that futility in crunch time on a regular basis, we may just have a shot at this thing!
Beware: Angry Saints
Ending the Saints’ season for a third year in a row might sound like a great night out right now, but we might have created a monster. With three in a row, Saints players and personnel will have nightmares about the Bears, and therefore, will be hard to beat again. It’s kind of like Russell Crowe fighting Joaquin Phoenix in the Gladiator finale. Even weakened and wounded, there’s no way Maximus would lose to Commodus based solely on the vengeance factor. So we’ve basically wrongfully imprisoned the Saints, enslaved them as gladiators and made them fight to the death before a crowd, raped and murdered their wife and killed their only son – all as they were about to inherit the thrown to Rome. Mark my words, when the Saints come marching in again, they’ll come charging, charging like Hurricane Katrina.
Reportin and Retortin on Orton
Orton blows. The Iowa native ranks 23rd in completion percentage (58.9%), 25th in yds/attempt (6.4), tied for 22nd for completions over 40 yds, and ranks 22nd in the NFL in QBR (80.1). To make matters worse, he had a QBR of 49.2 Thursday, with a whopping 30 in the crucial second half. Punter Brad Maynard threw one pass on a fake punt that went incomplete. His QBR was 39.6. So how good can this dude be if he’s as good a QB as our Punter? Don’t get me wrong, the Beard is as good as any QB in the league during a blizzard when all you do is run. But he’s inaccurate deep, mediocre at mid-range, and he’s about as mobile as an elephant in a closet. And on his second rushing TD of the season, he looked less graceful than his awkward first, waddling in like Ditka – and I’m not talking Iron Mike during his playing days, I’m talking now, fake hips and all. I’m sorry, but this guy is a decent back-up at best. He’s no starting QB, not even for the Bears. At least not if you want to get past the first round of the playoffs.
Division Ranks
We’re one game back in the North with two to play. We have to win both of ours, and MIN has to lose both of theirs. Whether we split, they lose two and we tie at 9-7, or we win two, they split and we tie at 10-6, they would win in the case of a tie. The NFL’s official division tie-breakers:
1. Head to Head. We split, so it’s a tie 1-1. This won’t decide anything.
2. Division Record. Only one division game left, us hosting GB Sunday. If we win, we’d tie MIN at 4-2. If we lose to GB but still tie MIN, we’d finish 3-3 and MIN would advance.
3. Record in Common Games. We’re 5-5 against DET (twice), GB (once) IND, TEN, JAX, CAR, TB, NO and ATL, with HOU and GB left to play. MIN is 7-4 with ATL left to play. If we tied at 9-7, we would have split with GB and HOU to finish 6-6, and MIN would have lost to ATL (and NYG) to finish 7-5, and they would advance. If we tied at 10-6, we would have beaten GB and HOU to finish 7-5, and MIN would have either beating ATL (and lost to NYG) to finish 8-4 and advance, or lost to ATL (and beaten NYG) to finish 7-5, and it’d be another tie.
4. Conference record. If we tied at 10-6, and MIN lost to ATL and beat NYG, they would finish 8-4 in the NFC, and even beating GB would leave us at 7-5, and MIN would advance.
So, in order to win the division, we need to beat GB at home and HOU on the road, and we need MIN to lose to ATL and NYG, both at home. Now let’s take a look at the Wild Card.
Wild Card, Schmild Card
We’re chasing DAL, as well as TAM and ATL, both of whom beat us and take a tie because of it, all at 9-5. So in addition to winning both our games, we would need three of these to happen:
– TAM to lose final two
– ATL to lose final two
– DAL to lose final two (I believe they take a non-head to head tie-breaker against us)
– PHI to lose at least one of final three (they play Monday night).
So we’re still alive, but only if just about everything goes our way. That loss to Atlanta is probably what will keep us out of the post season. But hey, it could be worse – we could be out of it already, or have Cedric Benson in our backfield.
Super Bowl, Super Keep Your Fingers Crossed!
© 2008
Bear Down Baffa 
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