Well that didn’t take long. In a matter of 8 days, the Bears went from 1st to worst, and then back to 1st again. And we did it without the “Captain And” Khalil Mack or our highest paid offensive player, Allen “Swiss Family” Robinson. Their combined game checks totaled $2.4M, which means we paid $600k for each of their butt cheeks to warm our bench. But the Bears led for 50 minutes, finished strong, and recaptured 1st place. So it was money well spent. And just like the cash the Clinton Foundation gives to protesters, it’s not our money!
Like a Mexican caravan, Truby is unskilled, highly paid, and
he refuses to be stopped before crossing the border to vote
The Low Down
The Troubador had a bad 1st half. If you take away the screen-pass to Tarik “C’est Chic” Cohen (which became a 70-yard TD), he was just 4/12 for 46 yards and a 45.8 QBR. He was better in the 2nd half, but not much. He finished 16/29 (55.2%) for 220 yards (7.6/att), 2 TDs, 0 INTs, and a 102.7 QBR. But on the same number of attempts as Jets’ rookie QB Sam Darnold, he had just 2 more completions, 70 more yards, and 1 more TD pass. So without the Cohen play, he was almost exactly Darnold. And we were ALL almost exactly Darnold watching from our couches.
I’m not sure where Mitchell is going on this play, and
I’m not sure that Mitchell knows where he’s going either
el Truberino also ran for another 51 yards, which is insanely just his 5th best rushing game in 19 starts. He almost single-handedly out-rushed New York, and he did that on 18 fewer runs. Over his last 4 games, he’s run for 232 yards (10 per), which would be over 900 yards if he kept that up for a season. Our 2nd best runner, Jordan “Is Better Than LeBron” Howard, had his best game this year, rushing for 81 yards and a TD. But he dropped his only pass, giving him just 1 catch in our last 4 games, as Trubisky has out-run him. Yikes.
Like Trump and money, Howard only seems to be
able to get his hands on the ball if it’s handed to him
Missing our best player, the Bears didn’t seem to miss a beat defensively. Though we didn’t get any takeaways, and only got 1 sack, our D held the Jets to roughly 100 yards per half. We also limited them to 14 completions, forced 8 punts on 11 drives (6 of which were 3-and-outs!), and held them to just 10 points. And the Bears wound up with more 2nd-half yards than the Jets gained all game. So for those of you who think this defense is all a product of Mack, you’re wrong.
After each play, Darnold seemed to be scanning
our sideline to make sure Mack wasn’t suiting up
Cody “Squi” Parkey missed another FG, bringing him down to 79% (11 for 14). It was his 2nd chunk in our last 3 games, and he may need to clear his head by having some “skis” with P.J. and Tobin. But he is 23 for 23 on XPTs. And though his numbers have dropped off, bringing his average down to 8 points a game, he’s still on pace for 128 – which is more than Gould in 10 of his 11 Bear seasons. So what I’m saying is he’s basically Gould, and like he was to Kavanaugh, Squi will be our nemesis this year.
Not even the referee could believe Squi missed that kick
Outlook
With the win, the Bears advance to 4-3. And Detroit (3-4), GB (3-3-1) and Minnesota (4-3-1) ALL lost. So all 4 teams in our division did the opposite of last week, which makes this win yuge. While 4-3 doesn’t sound particularly great, and Squi is really getting on my nerves, it was good enough to take back 1st place. And our defense got a nice ego boost, locking it down without Mack. Next, we head to Buffalo, where we’ll continue our soon-to-be 6-game winning streak. Or we’ll fall back into last place.
Without Mack, the Bears had to get George Soros to pay
several Jets’ players to help us tackle their teammates
Quotes of Note
Tony Romo, who took a while to buy into the Trubes: “I’m impressed by Trubisky in the 2nd half. Some errant throws earlier in the game. It’s windy, a tough environment. But I’m getting more and more impressed with him as this game is played on.” ~ Good, that makes one of us.
Truby must’ve started looking at his intended receivers in the 2nd half
Romo, on the Biscuit (clearly in the 2nd half): “Trubisky has all the other stuff. He can move, he can run, he’s a competitor, he gets through his progressions, he’s got good feet.” ~ He went on to say that Truby Tuesday has a good beat, and he’s easy to dance to.
Is it me, or does the white cop seem to
be looking to see if Cohen’s got a gun?
Jim Miller, when asked for his first impression during the post-game: “I wouldn’t call it a masterpiece. I’m not hanging this in the Art Institute of Chicago.” ~ Correctamundo, Potsie. But we can still hang it in the win column!
The Troubador: “No, I will not make out with you!“
BEAR DOWN!
Supa Bow, Supa BEARS!
#HavingSomeSkisWithSqui
#CorrectamundoPotsie
© 2018
Bear Down Baffa 
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