6. Bears Win Again, Begin Writing New Rap Song

Boy, that didn’t take long.  After falling in the standings 2 weeks ago, the Bears jumped right back into first place by beating up on Carolina and putting together our first complete and commanding win of the year.  And Green Bay got shellacked by Tampa, proving that the Pack isn’t as great as everyone (including me) feared, and that our beating Brady in week 5 is as monumental as it felt.  The Bears have now won 5 of 6, and appear to be peaking.  And before you start arguing that we haven’t beaten anybody yet, our opponents’ combined records against non-Bear teams is 10-13.  That’s not great, but it’s not shabby.  The bottom line is that the 2020 Bears are for real for real, folks.  And if you still doubt them after this smackdown on the Panthers, well, then that’s on you.

Carolina passing on their last chance to forfeit

The Low Down
This was a big defensive win and it started right out of the gate.  CAR got the ball first, starting on their own 10.  Their first 3 plays went:  rush for 1-yard loss, sack for 8-yard loss (at the goal line), INT returned to the Panther 7.  And just like that, less than 3 ½ minutes in, the Bears took a 7-0 lead they’d never relinquish.  Teddy “Like Trouble Over” Bridgewater was MUCH worse than his numbers suggest, going 16 of 29 (55%) for 216 yards, 0TDs, 2 INTs, and a 50.4 QBR.  Not only was this his lowest QBR of the season, but it was his lowest in 20 games, going back almost 6 years.  It’s strange how that seems to happen to every QB the Bears play.

We were on Teddy like a mask on Dr. Fauci
at an open-air fish market in Wuhan, China

Not only did the Bears sack Teddy 4 times and get 3 takeaways (3, that is, that weren’t called back), but we got 6 QB Hits on him.  And between the sacks and scrambles, we tackled him at least a dozen other times, and it definitely impacted his performance.  We only let CAR reach our endzone once – which wasn’t until we had a 14-point lead in Q4, and after we committed 4 penalties on that drive (which we’ll address later).  That’s the 3rd game in a row where the Bear’s D has only given up 1 TD.  And in 6 games, our D has given up the fewest TDs in the entire NFL (9), and that counts the 10 teams that have only played 5 games.  So the D seems to be coming together.

Is it just me, or does Khalil seems to be spending
a lot of time kneeling over opposing QBs lately?

Nicky Foosball did not have a great game statistically, going 23 of 38 (59%) for 198 yards, 1 TD, 1 INT, and a 72.0 QBR.  But not only has “1 Pick Nick” now thrown 1 pick in each of his 4 Bear games, but since he won the 2018 SB, he’s thrown exactly 1 pick in 10 of his 13 regular season games.  And “1 Pick” hasn’t thrown MORE than 1 pick in ANY of his last 22 regular season games over the last 5 years.  In fact, “1 Pick” has only topped 1 pick a total of 6 times over his 62-game career, giving him the 11th best INT rate in NFL history (2.108%).  So, don’t let some of his stats fool you, as it seems to be working for him.  And for the Bears.

“1 Pick,” asking for permission to throw a 2nd pick

Running, Bumbling, Stumbling
And how about this David “3 Card Monte” Montgomery?  This guy is learning to make something from nothing.  He had his 2nd best total yardage game of the year (97 yards on 23 touches), and the 4th best in his 21 games. Though our play-calling remains predictable, and the best compliment you can pay our O-line is to call them “inconsistent,” it appears that nobody told Monte.  He’s actually rushing for slightly more yards per carry this year (3.9 vs. 3.7), which is also slightly higher than Jordan Howard in 2018 (3.7).  He’s another key piece that seems to be hitting his stride.

Bring more than 2 if you plan to take down 3 card Monte

Cairo Crushes Kicking Competition
Kicker Cairo “Head Shoulders Knees And Toes, Knee” Santos is making the case for the Bears to give Eddy “70%” Pineiro the boot.  “Knee” Santos went 3 for 3 (including a career-best 55-yarder!) along with 2 PATs Sunday.  He’s now 10 for 12 (83%) on FGs and 12 for 12 (100%) on PATs.  His 2 misses came from 46 and 50 yards, and both were during wins.  Pineiro was 82% and 93% last year, respectively.  And 4 of Eddy’s 5 FG misses were critical.  In the SD loss, he missed from 33 early, and a game-winner from 41 at the buzzer.  And in the LAR loss, he also missed twice, from 47 and 48.  Eddy also missed 2 PATs.  So, even though Knee Santos is a foot shorter, I think he’s head and shoulders above Pineiro.

Because of his lack of stature, “Knee” Santos is allowed to
bring 1 adult chaperone with him whenever he’s on the field

Red Flag:  Our Penalty Propensity
One insane stat that I stumbled across and believe may clarify what’s been holding us back from being as dominant as we all think we should be – namely, our defense – is this:  after giving CAR 7 first downs by defensive penalty, our D now leads the NFL with 24 of them.  Astoundingly, that’s 4 more than any other team, and SIX TIMES as many as the league-best LA Chargers (yes, they’ve only had FOUR in 5 games combined!).  We also lead the league in total penalties with 90:  a perfectly balanced split of 45 offensive (tied for 1st in NFL) and 45 defensive (2nd in NFL by 1).  This is a team-killing stat.  The fact that we’ve won ANY games in spite of this, let alone 5 of 6, tells me the Bears are for realzies.

Even TE Cole “Becomes Diamond” Kmet showed up.
Here’s his 1st career TD catch – in double coverage.

Outlook
With SEA (5-0) being the only undefeated NFC team left, and no one else being 5-1, the Bears aren’t just in 1st place in our division, but we have the 2nd best record in our conference.  GB is 3rd, and tied for 4th (@ 4-2) are the Bucs and the Rams.  We already beat TB, which was big.  But a win over LA would be huge since they’re a likely Wild Card behind SEA.  And we get to play them Monday night!  Did you know that all 4 Ram wins came via the epically weak NFC East, who are a combined 5-18-1 (.217)?  And 3 of those wins came against each other?!  So the Bear’s outlook is about as good as it gets at this point.  Those of you STILL not on-board will soon be unable to deny what’s been obvious to us since the day we signed “1 Pick” – the 2020 Bears are gonna be really good.

A win Monday would give coach Nagy a .667 winning %,
yet there are constant (nonsensical) calls for his removal

Quotes of Note
1 Pick Nick, on winning ugly:  “Would you rather lose pretty, or win ugly?  I think that we’d rather win ugly…Great teams win no matter how it takes.” ~ Yup, no matter how it takes.

I’m cool with 1 pick.  I’m also cool with 1 glove, 1 helmet,
and 1 jersey number – as long as it leads to at least 1 SB!

BEAR DOWN!

Supa Bow, Supa BEARS!

#1PickNick
#NoMatterHowItTakes

© 2020

One Response to “6. Bears Win Again, Begin Writing New Rap Song”

  1. Mama Bear Says:

    LMAO about Santos allowed one adult chaperone……you’ve got ME a believer!!!

    Liked by 1 person

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