Bear Down Baffa

Godammit, another fucking loss to the country’s largest exporter of cheese, and largest importer of fudge.

The problem wasn’t yardage.  The Pack gained 5.7 yards per play, the Bears 5.6.  The problem surprisingly wasn’t Cutler or our offensive line either.  The problem was that Green Bay ran 17 more plays (69-52) because they played keep away with the ball all day.  We lost the time of possession battle by 15 minutes – that’s like splitting time for the first 3 quarters, and then giving them the ball for the entire 4th quarter.  Add in our typical slow start against the Pack, Martz’s lopsided play calling and an inept receiving corps that couldn’t catch a pass if it were covered in partially dried elephant semen, and it’s a recipe for losebagedness (for definition, click link).

Young Bears Fans Practice Dropping Passes – Like Their Heroes

GB scored 2 TD’s in the first quarter while we punted twice and threw a pick.  But after a solid second quarter that ended with a late FG, we were only down 7 at halftime.  At that point, both teams had passed for 180 yards, were 2 for 5 on third downs, and had 5 penalties for 25 yards.  But by game’s end, we were out-rushed 100 yards to 13 (and 11 of that was Cutler), out-penalized 10 to 7 (for 35 yards more), and gave up 25 first downs to our 11 (including 6 more passing and 6 more rushing).  So much for avenging last year’s post season fudge shellacking.

Cutler Offers up a Prayer That O-Line Will Protect Him

Cutler was decent, as was this week’s makeshift O-line.  The Butler completed 5 passes for 20 or more yards and started the second quarter going 7 of 8 for 155 yards and a TD – including passing for 82 yards on an 80-yard TD drive.  But he ended the first half with 3 straight incompletions and started the second half with 6.  Take those away (and at least 4 well-thrown-but-dropped passes), and he put up some solid numbers.  He and Rodgers threw the same number of balls for the same yardage, but Rodgers completed almost 20% more.  Cutler finished 21/37 (57%), 302 yards, 3 sacks, 2 TD, 2 INT, and a 79 QBR, while Rodgers was 28/38 (74%), 297 yards, 2 sacks, 3 TD, 1 INT and a 111 QBR.

Knoxville Looking for Excuse for Why he Dropped Pass That Hit His Facemask

Defensively we were sub-par, allowing almost 400 yards and 27 points despite GB starting in Bear territory only once.  But they did have the ball 14 times – and almost twice as long as we did.  Considering that, our D kept us in the game.  We tightened up in the second half, getting 2 take-aways on consecutive possessions (Urlacher had another diving INT) after GB hadn’t turned the ball over yet this season.  We also had 2 sacks, while Briggs had 13 tackles and forced a fumble that Pepp recovered.

Before Fumble Even Hits Ground, Briggs Yells “I Deserve a Raise!”

So Much for Our “Former Head Coach” Coaching Staff
Trailing by 10 with 4 minutes left and the clock already stopped after a GB incompletion, Lovie called yet another in a long line of bad timeouts.  And with this loss (our 5th out of the last 6 to the Cheese), he falls to 8-8 all time against the Pack.

Lovie “I’m Here to Beat the Packers” Smith

After calling 52 pass plays and only 11 runs in last week’s loss to New Orleans, OC Mike “Pass First, Ask Questions Later” Martz said, “If you’re looking for (someone to) blame, blame me.  I did a poor job of coaching.  I didn’t do a good job responding.  I should have adjusted better.”  Even Lovie said, “We can’t win football games with that kind of balance.”  So what did Martz do this week?  He called 43 pass plays and only 9 runs.  Forte had only 2 yards on those 9 carries, including 0 yards on 3 runs in the second half.  So apparently we now “get off the bus running” – running right to the passing game.

Tice and Martz Discuss Ways to Make Bears Offense Worse

The Bears Special Teams unit called a fake punt return while down by 10 with a minute left.  Even if we return it all the way (which we did with beautiful execution, only to be negated by a holding penalty), we’re not going to get the ball back.  And if by some miracle we do, we had no time-outs left.  So why unveil this trick play in a lost cause of a game?

Gary Coleman’s Twin Checks Hazard on Soldierz Field Grass

For the second week in a row, the Bears lined up in the Wildcat and had a False Start (1 of Hester’s 2 bone-headed penalties).  So we have yet to see them run a play out of this formation.  I attribute this to poor preparation, which can be attributed to poor coaching.

Laudable Audibles
In his post game interview, the Butler laughed when admitting he is not allowed to call audibles at the line.  Former Bear QB Jim Miller said that Cutler is “smart enough” to call audibles.  Miller also said that he played for 7 NFL teams and was allowed to call audibles for all of them, as well as in college and high school.  He then said, “From what I understand, in the Mike Martz system those (audibles) are not available.”  Dan Jiggets responded, “And apparently, neither is yardage.”  In my best Zach Galifianakis voice, “Classic.”

Hot – if You Like Short, Bow-Legged Chicks with Huge Nutsacks

The Good News
The Vikings led by 10, 17 and 20 at halftime of their first 3 games – and went on to lose all 3.  At 0-3, I heard a rumor they’re trying to get Brett Favre to come out of retirement.  (Actually, I started the rumor.)

And the Bad News
The most recent of the teams to come back to defeat Minnesota was Detroit, who (along with GB) advanced to 3-0, leaving us 2 games behind 2 teams – and it’s only week 3.

This Sweatshirt Says it All

Now on to the weak stretch in our schedule – and the beginning of the winning streak!

© 2011

This entry was posted on Mon, Sep 26, 2011 at 1:28 pm and is filed under j) 2011 Posts. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.