The 2015 Chicago Bears have done it. They’ve gone ahead and done exactly what none of us wanted them to do – win too few games to make the playoffs but too many to get a top draft pick. And just when they had their destiny by the balls, they drop another home game against a backup QB. And this one falls 100% on Robbie “I’ll Be Unemployed Soon, So It’s Good That I Invested In” Gould, who missed 2 FG’s for the 2nd time this year. And this after having the worst season in his career last year. Our only hope is that this loss moves us up a couple spots in the draft where we can pick up a new Kicker.
Gould trying to quiet the voices in his head after blowing our season
Recap
We scored first, led for a total of 15 minutes, and never trailed the entire game – even after Cutler threw an early pick-6. We started the 2nd half by driving 58 yards, but Gould missed a FG. And after we took our last lead with just over 3 minutes left, SF tied it a minute-and-a-half later when their QB “scrambled” for a 44-yard TD. Even then, we came right back with Deonte “Beyonce” Thompson returning the ensuing kickoff 74 yards. But Gould missed his 2nd FG in a row at the buzzer. We stopped SF in OT, but after we 3-and-outed, their QB throw a 71-yard TD on their 1st play.
SF defender flashing all 3 balls after Cutler’s Pick-6
The Low Down
The Bears beat A-A-Ron Rodgers in Green Bay, but they couldn’t beat backup QB’s in back-to-back games at home. Just when we thought the ineptitude spanning the NFC gave us a fighting chance, we go and lose to one of the most inept teams in our conference, and the lowest scoring offense in the NFL. We beat them in nearly every stat, had the ball for an extra 13 minutes, and forced them to punt 9 times. But by missing those 2 FG’s, Gould kicked our playoff chances right in the nuts.
More on Gould sucking later
Why Robbie “I Fucking Suck” Gould Fucking Sucks
On his 34-birthday, Gould missed a 40-yarder in the 3rd quarter, and a game-winner as time expired from 36 yards. Cutler had even set the table for him at the end of regulation, kneeling down on the prior play to put the ball in the middle of the field. Gould has now shanked 5 on the season. To put that into perspective, he hasn’t missed more than 5 attempts in a season since his rookie year, and even then he only missed 6. Seriously, WTF is wrong with this guy?!
SF’s QB: “Yeah, right there – that’s the kicker that totally sucks.”
Doubtlook
3 of the 4 worst teams in the NFC are now just 1 game behind us, we’re 2-6 in our conference, and we’re 1-5 at home. That’s about as bad as it gets, folks.
Gould blew out b-day candles, the game and our season on Sunday
Quotes of Note
No one said anything worth noting this week, except Gould, who mumbled some unintelligible bullshit while sobbing in the locker room.
Another million taxpayer dollars spent on masturbatory patriotism
BEAR DOWN?
#SoLong2015ChicagoBears
© 2015
Bear Down Baffa 
Tue, Dec 8, 2015 at 1:19 am |
During the last couple minutes of the game the camera cut to a happy, if not cocky, shot of Cutler. I thought to myself, “Hold off on celebrating your big win, it ain’t over yet!” Then sure enough, SF scored a TD and tied the game…and then Gould missed a FG…AGAIN! He’s way past his prime and should have left when he was on top of his game. No one wants to remember him like this! Why are the Bears winning games that weren’t anticipated and losing games they should be winning…especially at home?
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Wed, Dec 9, 2015 at 6:43 pm |
laurie,
thanks for your comments and for reading!
i think we’re just not a well-rounded team right now. i think mid-next year we should start to hit a stride of consistency after the new regime gets through the draft.
bear down!
bdb editor
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